Jason had his long awaited cervical fusion at C6-C7 on June 19, 2017. Nine months ago our health insurance denied his claim for this treatment two days before the surgery, so we held our breath through Father’s Day.
Through the days leading up to the surgery there were many friends and family who waited along side of us with abated breath to see if we would get the dreaded call for cancellation again. One friend from work offered to do a prayer chain on Jason’s behalf if I wished. As June 18, 2017 was coming to an end, the reality of the surgery happening became real and the risks of the surgery began to weigh heavy. This was my husband, my life companion, friend, father of my children and anything going awry could have devastating implications. I reached out to my friend from work to ask for the prayer chain. She replied stating that they would be praying “…not only for Jason, but also the doctors and all those attending him get a good night’s rest and be alert and attentive tomorrow.” There was comfort in having others pray for Jason.
Jason did remarkably well and felt almost immediate relief from the symptoms he suffered for months. I shared pictures of before and after the surgery on Facebook. Family and friends visited at the hospital and home in the days that ensued. Friends from church, work and neighbors offered to bring meals to support our family during Jason’s recovery.
Growing up, support of this kind was offered and received from family. Receiving this kind of support from anyone other than family was tacitly viewed as intrusive. Family matters needed to be kept inside the family was an unwritten rule. And while this greatly strengthened my sense of family and my sense of belonging, it provided a limited notion of family and who comprised it. The notion of independence and strength was, and still is, a big part of my identity.
I said yes to the offers of support made by friends and did so with new eyes. I felt no shame in asking for help or accepting offered help because I learned that we were not made to make it on our own. We will need help. We need help from God, by design. The ways in which His help is delivered will vary and I am open to receiving help in ways that are new to me. Being a gracious recipient of help, support, and blessings in general, honors the Giver and the giver. Being a gracious recipient also opens up my notion of family. My natural or blood family will always be important to me but I see now that we belong to a bigger family.
I am new in my journey of faith. I don’t have it all figured out but I am learning and constantly seeking.
Happy 4th of July!